OK. SO.... Where do I begin?? Between being a new mom who is avidly changing diapers, giving baths, changing clothes, etc. etc. Being a wife trying to find time to wash dishes, wash clothes, keep the house clean, cook, take care of baby and still look cute and be sexy when I can barely fit what is in my closet and when I am covered in throw up.... Add in career woman who is working beyond full time from home to grow a Harlem business which means making calls, organizing, setting up arrangements, keeping up with what is going on etc. etc... I'm like whew. Not to mention trying to be a good friend and keep up with my family I now know why the coined the phrase " super woman" although I feel I am FAR from that!

First I felt unpretty and un attractive. That hurt when I felt like now that I have had a baby will my husband even care to look at me the way he did when we were dating or how he did when I slimmed back down to a size 5? I was all concerned about having a happy baby and being a good mom, but not losing myself in the snot and slime and throw up that accompanies it. I wanted to stay sharp in my mind able to stomp with the big business dogs of NYC if you will. In New York City Life, I wanted to still meet up with my friends and chuckle with them ( which many of them have come to visit me and Calia of course) and last but not least I wanted to get some SLEEP!! Which is soooooooooooo underrated, by the way. It feels so good just to SLEEP!! Thankfully Calia has learned to sleep through the night!

I have to say I have learned a lot in this experience. How things change for better or worse and how to adjust and so forth. But I gotta say- HATS OFF to the single moms!!! If I didn't have Chris.... I really don't know what I would do. He is my personal hero making sure that all things are taken care of financially, emotionally, and spiritually. GOD could not have blessed me with a better man to spend my life with. As you all know he is full of jokes but I'm still gonna have to get on him for his little blogs about me being spoiled and whatnot.... mmmmmhmmmmm. Don't even get me started on HIM! But he is in there in the trenches with me, tired from working and still reading "Mufaro's Beautiful Daughters" with an African Accent and everything! LOL


Calia is such a precious part of our lives now and she is my personal little miracle.Some of you know my story of how I had been through two miscarriages and when Calia came along it was my wake-up call to get out of putting my celebrity enhanced career first and realize what really and truly mattered. Now when I look at my baby girl and she smiles I know I made the right decision. Even when she cries her eyes out I know I made the right decision.

Even our church family has shown so much love and it means so much to live the life we live with a baby in the grand NYC!

Now all we need to do is join the Rent is too D*** High party and figure out how we are going to afford a caretaker at $500.00 a week( I mean really?)

Things will come together. God has brought us this far and I don't think he will leave us yet.

The first Try(Me)ster of parenting: Where's the love?

What’s up blog followers! Yeah, I know it’s been a loooooooong time and y’all probably saw the notice and said,” I thought they stopped doing it.” Well not exactly, I guess you can say we’ve been busy and the times that we weren’t busy we were too tired to think -let alone write. Ok, now that I have given my excuses let me get started.


I did not get the notice that our little bundle of joy would come with such a strong set of lungs. I mean, when this girl gets worked up she screeeeeeaaaaaaams!!! I’ve never seen anything like it you would think a little person that is less than two feet tall would have a little voice. Ooooh no, this girl is auditioning to play a white girl in a scary movie. Another thing is I don’t understand how she can do it for so long. Don’t babies ever get hoarse, laryngitis/lose their voice? –somebody, anybody help me! Okay, I know it comes with the territory. Can I let y’all in on a little something? Now, don’t get mad at me and think that I’m insensitive towards my baby, but sometimes I can’t help looking at her while she’s screaming and just start cracking up. I don’t mean to laugh at my poor child, but she screams like it’s “bloody murder”
and often it’s all because she’s being held at a 60 degree angle when in fact she wanted to be held at a 65 degree angle. Seriously, I sometimes think she has a little stopwatch hidden to time how fast we will react when she starts crying. If we’re not making adequate progress she’ll turn the volume up an extra decibel. You may laugh but I’m serious…these little babies have us all fooled when in fact they are all little geniuses. Think about it… a baby’s little brain can process more simultaneous information than you or I could ever imagine. I’m just saying those little babies on the E-Trade commercials are only the tip of the iceberg. I’m telling you those little boogers are running things from the world market to the black market.


Now, what has become of my wife and I post-baby. Well, to our family my wife and I are no longer valid. My aunt has concurred that people no longer care what’s up with us; it’s all about the baby. While I wish I had a counter-argument her synopsis is in fact true. Case-in-point, now when the phone rings the conversation typically goes like this:


Me: Hello

Person: How’s the baby?

Me: She’s fine. I was going to…

Person: What’s she doing?

Me: She’s sleeping right now. You know I’ve been meaning to tell you…

Person: How long has she been sleep?

Me: About 20 minutes now. But guess what? Do you remem…

Person: Well, that’s good she’s getting her rest. You be sure to give her a kiss for me. *click*

Me: Hello, hello, hello

It is great that everyone is so excited and in love with the baby, but dang what about meeeeeeeee?


Outside of infancy there is never a more honest time in life. If you gotta burp, you burp; if you gotta fart, you fart; if you gotta booboo, you booboo -side note- why is it when a baby takes a crap you feel the need to refer to it as a booboo? Anyways, speaking of booboos I have never seen anything like it. I never knew it was possible to get it all out in one violent thrust. I promise the spontaneous combustion that occurs in this little baby girl’s diaper is epic! I’m almost certain if I could instant replay her booboos it would show that the force of her booboo projects her little body into the air. I’m not talking 42” vertical leaps, but there is a slight moment of levitation.


My wife has been a trooper throughout the entire process; from pregnancy, to birth, to arrival she has been amazing. I shared with her that before we got married my one area of concern was how she would be as a mother. Hey, hey, hey for those of you that know my wife really well you would have a moment of wonderment about this issue also. I mean to put it simply my wife has lived a spoiled life that has caused her to be a bit more skewed to the selfish side.
Over the years, as our relationship has progressed, she has definitely shed much of her single minded ways; but selfishness is like the chickenpox –even though the initial onslaught of the virus has been contained and mostly eradicated, it remains with you for life. Seriously, motherhood has turned my wife into an even more amazing, all-giving, and loving woman. Sometimes I just sit back and watch her interact with Calia and I almost want to shed a tear -hold on let me bring my macho back- I ain’t no punk so I don’t cry! To see my wife and baby together is one of the most beautiful displays of love in its purest form. I’ve always heard that when your wife has your child it intensifies the way you feel about her. I already thought I was deeply in love with her, but something about her having my child provides a somewhat different type of love in addition to the already existing deep love. Hopefully, that makes sense because it’s hard to explain.


So what has life been like with a fresh new human being amongst us you ask? Life has been fantastic!!! All parents say it about their baby –even though y’all know as much as I do that not every parent should say it…Chris be nice- but she is the most beautiful, precious baby I have ever laid eyes on; even if my eyes are half-way open because she decided to test the lungs out at 4:30 a.m. I guess one thing I can say about parenthood is you never know until you know. My mother told me many times that I could not imagine how much and deeply she loved me and my brothers until I have my own children and only then would I understand. Mom, you were absolutely right! The feeling is hard to put in words because no matter how passionately you speak on it or how many adjectives you use there is simply no translation. We’ve been blessed to hold a miracle/gift from God in our arms. When I look at her -ok, I stare at her rather intently…almost stalker-like- I have this feeling of adoration and what’s so special is she looks back at me with the same adoration…or maybe she’s thinking, DANG, TAKE A PICTURE! I prefer to think it’s the former. Our journey and family is just now beginning and I can’t imagine nor would I want to change my life for anything.


Until next time folks, peace.
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